I FOUND IT!!!

Okay, so everything that I do takes DAYS, MONTHS, YEARS!! I have been obsessing about getting a new toilet seat since last summer. I went to the hardware store yesterday, I bought one, and I installed it. ALL BY MYSELF! I am so proud that I just wanted to take a photo and facebook it. I stare at it everytime I walk by. I AM PROUD!! I even tried it out. When I was growing up, my Dad installed the toilet seats. In my adult life, mommy installs the toilet seats, buys oil tanks, and tries to figure out how to invest $$. I am 36 and just about ready to embark on this adventure. Just so you know, home improvement, weight loss, and investments all have a lot in common. When you get in control of one or the other, some other things just fall into place. So I joined weight watchers 4 weeks ago, I have lost 7 pounds, then I finally got the toilet seat, and now my confidence is soaring, so I hunted down the roth. When one thing is working, it all seems to work. In a previous post I mentioned that I had started a pathetic ROTH IRA through my little part time job. I started it last July when my kids were in summer camp for 20 minutes and I had a minute to start a retirement account. I have been wondering since last July where this money is and how much I have, and where it is located. Well, guess what?? I FOUND IT! I wanted to take a picture and facebook it! "Look- it's my fidelity account!" I even have a user name and password, which I don't remember ever creating. The point is, I am taking control. I even started on-line banking, as if this is a new invention. On Thursday, our good friend Bern got divorced. It was sad, and happy and a cause for drinks and celebrating. After some liquid cheer, I bring up the on-line banking- do my friends know that this exists? That you can pay a bill without a stamp and a check? They were so bored that I was even bringing this up. Bern has never eaten chicken on a bone or cooked a potato, but she can totally pay all her bills on-line. I compare it to the invention of the lightbulb, and they have been at it for years. Why didn't anyone tell me? I felt sort of dumb...Like I said, at 36 I am still learning to be a grown-up. I am just learning to bank on-line, to install toilet seats and I am working my way up to the purchase of stock. Then I will be a real woman, when I bank on line and purchase stock. I am almost there! Christine had me sign my name to some sort of banking document to set up a bank account. It's going to be truly real any day now!

$20 is a lot of money??

Okay, so I am out in the world trying to recruit people- GEES! I went to get my "Rapunzel" hair cut trimmed by my very cool hair dresser with a sleeve of tattoos. A "Tat sleeve?" is that the term? Well, she is a cool hair dresser mom, who happens to like tattoos and cocktails. She has apparently alienated all the parents in her daughter's class because her daughter had some "behavioral issues", and now she wants to move to another school district. I have always wanted to hang out with her, and intend to invite her for coffee everytime I get my hair cut (for the last 6 years), but always forget or move on. While I was inviting her to join the mythical investment group, she hacked my hair worse than normal and now I have a female version of the mullet, instead of my once cute "rapunzel." I keep ruining the end of the movie for everyone when I explain to them that the inspiration of my hair cut is when Eugene cuts off Rapunzel's blonde pony at the end of Tangled. There, I just ruined it for you too. So, I explain the very casual stock investing idea to Jean, and she is confused and claims that her husband handles all the finances. She has some stocks that she inherited, and gets a dividen? check for (see I can't even spell dividend?- the check you get when your stock makes money). Then she claims that $20 is a lot every month. Look, I think that I totally wasted $20 yesterday on mighty beans and plastics easter eggs. How much do tattoos costs? Gees, maybe she could get half a tattoo next time and invest something. All the while, she is saying "Sure, I'll do it." But she is looking at the ground. I live intuitively. She is not interested.